Why ceremony?

In modern, western society, ceremony has all but gone extinct. We see vestiges of it in some religious practices, to be sure, but in wider society there is little but pomp and circumstance: droning speeches at college graduations, canned wedding ceremonies, political inductions that are all empty fanfare. No wonder most of us raised in this society not only don’t practice ceremony in our lives, but actively avoid it. Who would want to be a part of something so dry, impersonal, and meaningless?

I am standing on my own tiny soapbox to proclaim the value of ceremony in our lives. Nay, not just the value- the necessity. Yes, a bold assertion to our intellectualized psyches. I will be the first to defame such dead ceremonies as described above; they are at best an echo of the true power of ceremony and at worse a mockery of all that is sacred and meaningful in our lives.

But we won’t dwell on these empty ceremonies. Instead, I am here standing on my overturned box to invoke within all of us an ancient memory: a primal stirring of remembrance of sacred gathering. All our family and community together, the central fire blazing… song, words from the heart, tears flowing… looking into the eyes of your loved ones, knowing you are connected, you are here together and supporting each other, feeling seen and known and respected and loved… Feeling the breeze rustle your hair, smelling the damp soil beneath your feet, seeing the light of stars filling you with wonder, joy… gratitude.

This is what ceremony can give us. It opens a doorway to connect with our deep and direct experience of all that is holy, meaningful, sacred and moving to us. Ceremony invites us into communion with ourselves, touching our own feeling, our own love and joy and wonder and gratitude and also our own grief and tenderness. Ceremony holds us in all our human experience and provides a safe space where we are allowed, loved, and supported. In ceremony we are seen- by ourselves, by the divine ones, by our community. In ceremony we are known and honored. In ceremony we receive. We receive the support of the unseen beings, the divine ones, our spirit allies, the earth, the sun, the waters and trees- and we receive the support of our community.

In ceremony we remember that we are not alone.

All this support, wisdom and inner feeling is always available to us. The unseen beings and spiritual allies are always here for us. Ceremony does not magically make this appear out of nowhere. But do we feel it? Do we daily walk with the grounded sensation of being deeply supported in our lives, in touch with our sense of deep meaning, reverence and gratitude? Are we in communion with our inner knowing? Do we feel seen and loved and connected with our loved ones, our family, friends and wider community?

Most of the time we don’t. We are busy, distracted, dealing with all the concerns and efforts and activities of life. This is not “bad”. It’s just the nature of being a busy human. Ceremony gifts us with sacred space- the “time out of time”- and opens a doorway to see, feel, and receive all that is here for us.

So I’m here on my little box, holding open the door for you.

You won’t know what is here waiting for you until you step through.